(I forgot to mention 2 days back: the short story “Dreamcatcher” is now available on Unpublished Stories. In case you lose your way around the internet, here’s a direct link: http://bit.ly/MPtDRQ)
I’ve been called out for being too whiny-complainy-negative on this blog.
My first instinct was to defend myself: it’s my blog, dammit! I should be allowed to write what I want! At least when I whine, I whine entertainingly. I employ the use of clever metaphors to communicate my frustration.
(“the cafeteria food is like a politician’s promise: ultimately cold and unsatisfying”)
Besides, it’s a writing exercise! I have to write what’s on my mind and heart, and that I shall write. Further, I write plenty of joyful, uplifting stuff too!
“A Murder of Crows“, for example.
But fine. I shall allow it. Today, I will take a turn from the usual dreary tone of this space, and I will talk now about the 5 Best Things About Work:
(mine, not yours)
My first job involves me sitting in an office with a laptop but no internet access. It was, in a word, torture. So yes, I am thankful for that, for without internet at this present workplace, I may have already resigned, set something on fire, or killed myself.
2. Free Parking
I hear you people whose daily concerns involve the availability of parking spaces, and the ridiculous prices you pay just to park your car for a couple of hours. I empathize with you, and I also laugh at you.
3. No Tolls
I hear you other people, whose daily expenses, on top of the ridiculous parking fee, includes money to the government in the form of tolls. Again, I empathize with you, and again I laugh.
(less uproariously compared to the former, for it was once my burden to bear)
Even as the toll price hike looming just beyond the horizon, I hold on the happier thoughts.
Polar vortex? Let me put a jacket on. Drought? No problem. Just loaded my flask with water. Firestorm? We’re all doomed anyway. Why worry?
I’m glad I’m not out in the sun getting gorgeously tanned. Unlike the other girl you know as Sue.
5. Swirly Chairs with Wheels
Sometimes the best part about this job is how I can just literally turn my back on everyone else, open a book, and start reading. And it’s not just a swirly chair with wheels – it’s one of the better swirly chair with wheels. A middle-class option, I might say.
(an upper-class option would be the one with a headrest and black leather seats)
And there you have it. 5 best things about my job.
So don’t say that I complain too much.